Showtime at the Apollo

Before he arose from the waves on a clam shell to do us all a big ol' favor by becoming our leader, Obama told us rubes he'd put all non-emergency legislation on the White House website so we could take a gander at it and have someone explain the gist of it to us if necessary. I can think of a great reason he should revisit that specific lie. He doesn't read what he's signing. That's right. His approach to legislation that affects millions of Americans yet unborn is the same one I've personally applied to leases, tax returns and divorce settlements.

The press and other unreconstructed partisans ( the wage slaves who don't have anything saved up to lose) have a keen interest in helping Obama look less like an ass. They'd soil themselves at the opportunity to read Big Man's paperwork. If there was anything hinky -- like language that cancels out any recently lifted Executive Orders, say -- they'd let him know. During business hours, of course, not on weekends, holidays, or Wednesday nights. They can leave a voicemail at Treasury or something.

Or maybe someone could sneak Obama's resignation into a farm bill or a bill designating the week of June 21st as Mildew Awareness Week. Think of it. We could have him out by Labor Day.